Spring in DC = Cherry Blossoms and Clueless Tourons

Ah, the signs of Spring in Washington:

  • Cherry blossoms
  • Allergies
  • Tourons* by the busload, clogging up Metro escalators and everything downtown.

Typical scenario:  rush hour, people hustling to catch the train to get to work on time.  Washingtonians standing right, walking briskly down the left side of the escalator.  All of a sudden, the walkers come to a screeching halt.  A family of tourons blocking both sides, looking around, takign pictures of the Walt Whitman inscription from the Dupont Circle Metro.

Washingtonian:  Excuse me (polite but to the point, screaming in his mind:  stand on the right, walk on the left!!!)

Touron:  No response

Washingtonian:  Excuse me!!!

Touron: turns around slowly, surprised someone has accosted him.  What’s going on?

Washingtonian:  Excuse me (motioning to the right).  Can I get by?

Touron:  (indignant, confused, finally shuffling over)  Well, I guess he’s in a hurry.

Yes, it’s called work.  Respect the city and its residents.

* touron = tourist + moron

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